Dream on!!!

'Wonder what is real, this life or its dreams' - anonymous / Rajesh ( if the anonymous doesn't reveal himself )

Since I had gained a self conscious and thought process ( somewhere around the age of ten ) , I have been always wondering of two things - Death and after, Dreams (DD). I guess this double DD should be the second best one in the DD series (hope you know the first best one).

In this post let me snake (doing justification for the blog title :P) about Dreams.

Dreams have been a constant source of inspiration, self reflection and a mystery to me, since I started remembering them even after waking up. Once such dream was an adventure fantasy, where I was running on a makeshift wooden pier and suddenly a huge Shiva Lingam (The Holy Phallus) emerges from the waters underneath (something similar to the league of extra ordinary gentlemen) and I start running towards the shore - dream scene cuts - and it takes me to a tunnel sort of things where I am being chased by circular discs looking similar to the Vishnu Chakras (models all those space crafts of space movies). Thus inspired by this I made this holy crap ( see the image below) depicting saivites and vainavites fighting for the supremacy.

Then one day I happened to meet Lord Hanuman who wasnt in his best of moods, sort of in a Dark Knight-ish costume and attitude in a dilapidated home some where in the attic. God knows what I was doing there , but he told me to stay put and moved to the next room and I could hear fighting sounds and oops , scene cut. That was a strange meeting and still puzzles me why Lord Hanuman appears, as I dont have any particular favorites among mythological characters (plus am agnostic).

The most often occurring dreams can self reveal many things. For example, I reach late for exams; study shit scared for some exam and the next day go and sit to find out it is an different exam - reflecting my characteristic restlessness in things. Falling down, dropping dead in some accidents or shoot out - showing the influence of movies and the fear of death combined. Moving away from home, driving a car - two things which I haven't master yet.

Dreams tell me about my perceptions of people. There was this emotional dream where my grand ma appeared in good health and vigor. This dream occurred few years after her death (she passed away slowly after being bed ridden), showing how much I missed her and how much I wanted her to get cured; which was quite a surprise to me. There was also this one particular dream, where my childhood friends, my college mates and my current boss, whom haven't met each other before (upto my knowledge) happen to be in some place with me as the topic matter of discussion. This dream I guess tells me whose company and views I value the most. And ofcourse there are boyish dreams; dreams of me with my list of wannabes (celebrities and few specials for whom I had a liking in some phase of my time). Interesting thing, when the wannabes moves out of list, they are shown to be dead in dreams.
  
Time trend in my dreams. From my childhood my dreams have reflect the things that is the top on my worry or wonder list (I guess this phenomenon should be same for everyone) with some random outlier dreams. From adventure fantasy, death, exams, wannabes, I often get dreams of office and family now, indicating the top tocare list.

Whatever the dreams may be, they take my mind and my body sometimes (I feel body reflexes in while falling) into altogether different world, which I would like to explore more at my pace sans the edit cuts (as they say in the movie Inception - you don't know how you get into the dream scene). If one is able to find the path of how to get into the dream, I will happily do livid dreaming for the rest of my life.

Dream on!!!

DNA party

Why is the structures of DNA and other things around it looks like a party celebration , colorful ribbons and papers flying around...

Why this Lollu veri di???

why this lollu veri lollu veri di
why this lollu veri lollu veri di

white background night-u nigth-u
night-u color-u black-u
distance la dog-u dog-u
dog-u  color-u  grey-u

why this lollu veri lollu veri di
why this lollu veri lollu veri di

white skin-u girl-u girl-u
girl-u melanine-u low-u
bike-u bike-u lift-u lift-u
I gave her liftu

why this lollu veri lollu veri di
why this lollu veri lollu veri di

maama helmet eduthuko
apdiye kaila saavi eduthuko
duurrr durr durrrrrrrrrr
sariya ooatu
super maama ready
ready 1 2 3 4

whaa wat a wheeling over maama

ok maama now gear change-u

road la bump
bump la jump
bike-u full-aa fly-u
empty road-u
bike-u slip-u
humpty dumpty fall-u
bowwu bowwu
doggy bowwu
I start my bike-u
bull-u shit-u she slip-u
i escapeu in bike-u
god she's getting bitten now-u
I am happy how-u

this song is a mokkai remake-u
U ass why read-u

why this lollu veri lollu veri di
why this lollu veri lollu veri di

So, Where was I?

A long break, I must say. My dash board says “last published on Jun 23, 2011”. Nearly 5 months since my last post. Does it mean, I didn’t had thoughts or feelings to express? Or was just too lazy enough to open a “Document.docx” and start typing or was in the process of findings higgs boson particle that kept me speeding away in the circular tunnel and go dizzy all this while. Well, I guess I didn’t had the “thing” during this gap to write a piece of something. Hmmm, so why not gibber about this “gap” to get back on track.

So what I did/gained/learned in this “gap”

1. Gained few pounds , by not going to the gym regularly and finally not even passing by that place.

2. Books:

Started reading many books and have finished only one as of now. And they are

Tao of Physics – An awesome book on the comparison between Modern scientific approach to physics and the ancient philosophies of India, China & Japan. At times this book made me feel, to just drop all the bonds and obligations in my life and follow the Tao (which is unknown). Reading the book, it gave some sort of peace or illusion worth seeking for. After all Sanyaasa is not that easy, someday I shall try out the Saffron.

AdKatha – This book was released in AD ASIA 2011 conference. A nice collection of the history in Indian Advertising ranging from the British era to 21^st century. Who doesn’t love a big colourful hard bound glossy book.

The Secrets of Naga – the second part in Shiva’s Trilogy by Amish. Was amused and disappointed, with the abrupt revelation of Naga Lord who turned out be Lord Ganesh. Until the trunk wasn’t described, the description of Naga in first part was not even closely related to Ganesh. But the author has brought out the concept of duality (good & bad) very well.

And there are many other smalls small books with only few pages conquered.

3. Finally made a trip on my bike with buddies to Pichavaram, the world’s largest mangrove forest. Used satellite images to plan when to leave accordingly to escape rains and luckily/scientifically it worked as travelled through without stopping in rains (w2g INSATs). Clicked awesome pics, went to the Great Thillai Natarajar Temple (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chidambaram_Temple) and was amazed and inspired by the Architecture of those times. Even though I haven’t move a single stone, yet was proud be to a Civil Engineer from the land where great Temples have been constructed. One has to carefully observe these temples, as they offer lot of insights into the Culture of the past in Tamil Nadu. Made a point to study about the culture of the ancient past through the architecture and planning of the great temples in Tamil Nadu.

4. Got the touch of the present, by user experiencing iOS (through iPad 2) and Android. Getting amazed and amused by the infinite variety of apps in both the OS platforms. Apps likes flipboard, Pulse, Ted has kept me away from blogging I guess. Really happy and fascinating to be in the times where the World is making break throughs in digital technology.

Well that’s it. There were other thoughts, but so poor of them as they died off like the innumerable no. of sperms that don’t live to meet the ovary.

Painting of Life

It starts as a stroke in a plain white sheet,

Like a very small dot in a big blue world;

As the brush is dipped in a palette of colors,

The red baby feet are soiled;

Creative fingers that behold and guide the brush,

The creator’s finger holds hand and leads the child;

Base colours spread all over begins to dry,

Characters and attitude spreads out and starts to fly;

Half sheet done, the colours choose their neigbours and order the brush,

The offspring blooms out and chooses its society;

Strokes and colours sprayed becomes inerasable,

Choices made and decisions taken are irreversible;

Each sheet is unique with its strokes & colours,

So is life with its experiences…

HE & SHE: Life Partnering - a discussion

HE: hi,i have couple of questions...
SHE: regarding what?
HE: in general
SHE: ok
HE: I was thinking ‘why people are dissatisfied with their marriages?’
see we have two levels of achievement/ desire / goal when we marry or want to settle in life.
One is physical that is the basic animal instinct - make a family, off spring, satisfaction, lineage etc, comfort, protection - all pertaining to survival instincts
Another one is intellectual to be yourself, express freely without any restrictions, freedom, think and act like what you want..
so purpose of life may
1. survival/material pleasures
2. intellectual advancement
and the thing in this is survival it is easy or atleast
SHE: ok shall I interrupt
HE: no :)
SHE: for survival we need him or her but for intellectual we dont and hence objection overruled :P
HE: mummy :(
but the thing is whatever thoughts arise people tend to express with partners. Just for survival sake one partner and intellectually sharing with other persons, even in that the other partner might feel they are not so close, not so known with partner seeking external intellectual friends.
SHE: yes
HE: but if one tries to explain all these things to his/her partner then also...
SHE: then also no use
HE: yeah!!!
see in that case if a partner tries to explain her (his implied everywhere)
hmm no I will use ‘his’ everywhere, is it ok?
‘his’ means ‘his/her’ agreed?
no chauvinism intended,ok?
SHE: hmm okay!!! now that i know you will be damaging the partner use his :)
HE: that’s what I thought. But you see if people read it,they are more used to his as a reference to both the sexes than her. That’s why...
ok am continuing...
after satisfying one’s physical survival goals which mostly happens successfully in every marriage as people are generally healthy, and easily satisfied in achievement of their physical/material goals.
SHE: wait...
HE: families are formed easily
SHE: interruption
HE: ok
SHE: to test this ‘his/her’ more used to her, I used this for the first time in a presentation. It was about security
HE: oh tell me :) :)
SHE: I used 'his' for an intruder and attacker suddenly everyone asked me to replace it.
So see it's psychological
HE: hmm
SHE: ok continue
HE: yeah families are formed easily, homes made and so a sense of physical/material survival becomes surely acheived after few years of marriage with a home, kids or continued satisfaction of physical needs like comfort, sex, help, steady food, shelter and so on...
After this the person seeks for intellectual development. My view is ID (intellectual development) will prosper and occur through sharing of knowledge ideas, debate conversation and other interactions with people of the same intellect or higher intellect.
So in this case of ID the person has two choices
1. interact with the outside world so often for validating his theories, views, ideas and getting comment and reviews. By doing so he has to maintain a set of people as friends for a long time to constantly review his understanding progress. But maintaining a set of people for a long time is difficult as people and time keeps changing.
So in that case he might turn to his partner. Lets mark this stage (A) - turning to his partner for ID.
Now lets say he gets a set of friends people outside his home with whom he constantly interacts and mutually indulge in ID.
In that case he gets a set of friends, people outside his home with whom he constantly interacts and embark in the journey of ID.
So after few years when the physical survival need gets changed into more of daily comfort routine like food, clothes and household comforts, his level of interaction with the partner might stop at that level. (assuming as people age .. they have less physical relationship)
So both the partners feel like they are just bonded for the sake of some daily ritual and their intellect will start to reason what they have shared intellectually or what are the moments they have had (non-physical ones)l which they can relish or expect forward in their life.
So in that case a sense of disappointment creeps in and they feel that they haven’t known each other so much on a intellect basis.
SHE: hmm you have made a very valid point.
But we cant generalize. May be
HE: hmm wait... will try to explore lot of other scenarios
SHE: I had some other question in my mind
HE: this is only 1 scenario
SHE: ok
HE:so what if the person doesn’t have intellect partners in the outside world
He turns to his partner that is (A) in this case and his partner can be
1. of low intellect
2. of almost same intellect
3. of higher intellect

Now lets take case 1
SHE: ok
HE: if the partner 1 is of low intellect he has to either not discuss about his ID thoughts or try to improve the intellect of his partner.
If he doesn't discuss then all the thoughts die within himself as he also has no outside intellectual friends and thus disappointment for me. But if he tries to improve the intellect so that the partner is discussion worthy then he has to spend time preparing the partner.
SHE: In this we will have 2 cases
HE: and either it might take a long time to change his partner
SHE: the partner is wiling to
HE: or he might fail changing her
SHE: not willing to
HE: yeah
SHE: and another case is the partner doesn’t want to learn and improve
SHE: all three cases are v much possible
HE: hmm ok
let me continue with the assumption of the partner is willing to learn, other cases we will build further
SHE: continue sir
HE: going on,so the he tries to
. make the partner knowledgeable
2. downgrades his intellect
to suit the partner
in case 2. the intellect guy acts as a dumb according to his inner self to suit himself to his partner
SHE: ok
HE: so disappointed again in case 2 as he is not living upto his full extent
Now in case1.make the partner intelligent he spends his time helping out his partner to become more intellect,
and the time taken for a person to develop the intellect it takes a lot of time. so by that time he would have lost his energy or forgot about thoughts or his thoughts might have been outdated or would have felt that he has lot valuable hours in teaching rather developing his ideas so again disappointment.
agreed?
SHE: agreed
HE: now case 3
SHE: ok
HE: the partner is intellectually superior
then the opposite of 1st case happens; he feels that he is inferior and so a complex develops and thus again disappointment
SHE: oh
hey in this disappointment happens for the other partner also
HE: yes. Lets us look these scenarios with this analogy
two engines are there going uphill if both are at the same velocity then only travel will be smooth
now lets take a faster engine (superior person) and slower engine( intellectually inferior person) chained (bonded by marriage)
if slower engine is in the front the faster one has the burden of pushing the slower
SHE: yes
HE: and slower feels it is being pushed
SHE: I got that
HE: other case the faster in front and slower one in back
Then faster has to pull and slower feels dragged
SHE: ok
HE: faster after a time doesn't pull as it might lose energy and disentangle
SHE: you want to visualize life like that!!!! hmmm
HE: a big gap in their life he is mentally somewhere
SHE: what if I don't want to visualize like that
HE: hmm
see the partner is intellectually lagging and also taking the first case of the faster pushing the slower what if faster gets tired all the while by pushing slower and their whole life becomes slower and loses speed. kind of life losing the essence of life
SHE: hmm what if he doesn’t push??
want to put his wife in the backyard and so happy about it
HE: if he doesn’t push he will be slow. see one always wants to perform to their max efficiency be it an engine or a human.
though even people may say the reasons like
love forgiveness
understanding
adjustment
inside somewhere they might feel they are not performing up to their intellectual capacity due to their adjustment with partner
SHE: ok
HE: every machine must operate at its maximum efficiency efficiency after that the machine even tries to improve its efficiency. doesn't it?
SHE: hmm!!
HE: so the hill symbolises the path of ID and the engines are the partners and the link the marriage/wedding/relationship
SHE: ok what if the person is ok that he is superior and doesn't mind if the slower one doesn’t climb
HE: if the slower one doesn't climb then no ID
no ID automatically disappointment
As i told before
HE: so things boil down to case no.2 both people are intellectually similar
i.e both the engines go at the same speed
SHE: ok ok
HE: that is why people always try to find a partner who understands them the most
or at least mostly
SHE: ok
HE: intelligent people try to find such partner
if not in the start everything will be rosy rosy either due to high satisfaction of physical survival but in the later stage intellectual survival becomes a question mark
and thus disappointment creeps in and hence people are disappointed with their marriages after long time
We don't see people saying disappointed in the initial stages too much as in the later stages
SHE: hmm you didn't handle stage 2 properly
HE: stage 2 both going at the same speed a perfect couple
as the engines travels one might get faster or slower that again boils down in to
stage 1 or 3 that is why even love marriages or intellectually agreed upon couples
feel disappointed in the later stage
:)
thus both the engines should always agree upon the same speed
SHE: hmm ok good analysis
HE: thank u
SHE: :)